4 Todesfälle im Jänner, 4 Gedenktage. Jeder Tag ein Geburtstag.
19/02/2019 Karl Nessmann

4 Todesfälle im Jänner, 4 Gedenktage. Jeder Tag ein Geburtstag.

Posted in Das Wort zum Buch

Der Umgang mit dem Tod und meinem Leben. Wie das Leben so der Tod. Was ist deine größte Angst vor dem Tod? Was ist das Wichtigste im Leben? Welche Bedeutung hat der Tod in deinem Leben?

Huch, das war vielleicht wieder ein JÄNNER!!! Wie jedes Jahr gedachte ich auch heuer wieder meiner im Jänner geborenen und bereits Verstorbenen der Ursprungsfamilie. Heuer etwas intensiver, weil die am 16. Jänner 1960 geborene Schwester erst vor kurzem (4.8.2018) nach langem Krebsleiden von uns gegangen ist. Mein anderes Schwesterherz (geb.4. Jänner 1955) verstarb bereits 2004 in ihrem 49. Lebensjahr (am gleichen Krebs). Unsere Eltern haben sich leider noch früher verabschiedet: die Mutter im 58 Lebensjahr (22. Jänner 1927 – 25. September 1985) am gleichen Krebs und der Vater im 46 Lebensjahr (24. Jänner 1927 – 3. Oktober 1973) an einem Herzinfarkt.

Da war ich gerade einmal 16 Jahre jung und wurde von einem Tag auf den anderen „Juniorchef“ im elterlichen Betrieb (Mobil-Tankstelle-Rasthaus-Pension in Arnoldstein am Dreiländereck). Nachdem ich ohnehin schon seit meiner frühen Kindheit im Betrieb als Tankwart, Kellner und „Mädchen für alles“ mitgearbeitet hatte, bin ich relativ rasch in diese Rolle hineingewachsen. Aber darum geht es in diesem GEDENKMONAT nicht. Da gehen mir andere Gedanken durch den Kopf, Gefühle und Erinnerungen tauchen auf sowie Fragen über Fragen: Warum mussten sie alle so früh sterben? Wie wirkt sich die genetische Erblast auf meine eigenen Kinder aus? Wie werden wir damit umgehen? Warum bin ich als einziger noch am Leben? Welcher Auftrag ergibt sich dadurch für mich? Welchen Sinn hat das Leben und Sterben? Was ist nach dem Tod? u.v.a.m. Keine Sorge, darüber werde ich nicht schreiben, wohl aber eine wichtige Erkenntnis fürs Leben im HIER und JETZT mitteilen.

WIE DAS LEBEN SO DER TOD!

Alle, die ich beim Sterben über längere Zeit bis zum Schließen ihrer Augen begleiten durfte (bis auf meinen Vater auf Grund seines plötzlichen Todes) sind so gestorben, wie sie lebten. Vor allem in den letzten Wochen, Tagen und Stunden zeigte sich das besonders intensiv. Wie die Sterbebegleiter im Hospiz (Caritas Socialis) es aufgrund ihrer langjährigen Beobachtung mir erklärten: jeder stirbt auf seine Art. WIE DAS LEBEN SO DER TOD. Bei allen ist die größte Angst vor dem Tod das Gefühl und die Sorge, das LEBEN NICHT GELEBT ZU HABEN. Und auf meine Frage, was für sie im Leben das Wichtigste sei, antworteten sie alle: DIE LIEBE. DIE LIEBE BLEIBT. Ich erlebte immer wieder, wie sehr Sterbende am Leben hängen, wie groß die Lust am Leben ist, wie schwer das Loslassen fällt, wie sehr der Augenblick zählt. Besonders im Angesicht des Todes geht es darum, aufmerksam zu sein, wahrzunehmen, zuzuhören – ja es geht echt um vieles: Versöhnung, Zuwendung, Glaube, Liebe, Hoffnung. Für viele Menschen sind LOSLASSEN, GELASSENHEIT, ACHTSAMKEIT und all die bisher genannten Begriffe nur dahergeredete (esoterische) Schlagwörter und jetzt eben wieder Modewörter, für mich und mein Leben jedoch von ganz konkreter Bedeutung.

DIE WELT DREHT SICH AUCH OHNE MICH WEITER!

Vor dem Hintergrund dieser Erfahrung und der eigenen Höllenfahrten (Lebenskrisen, Niederlagen, Krisen), habe ich keine Angst mehr vor dem Sterben. Nur ein zu früher TOD meiner eigenen FAMILIE (Frau, Kinder, Enkerln, Neffen, Nichten) und engsten Freunde bereitet mir Sorgen und würde mich schmerzen. Aber der eigene Tod nicht. Für mich ist er ein ständiger Begleiter, ein elementarer Bestandteil des Lebens – wie Freude und Trauer, Lachen und Weinen. Der Umgang mit dem Tod ermöglicht mir eine größere Sorgfalt im Umgang mit meinem Leben. Er zeigt uns die ENDLICHKEIT hier auf Erden, wie kurz es ist (egal wie alt wir werden), ein Wimpernschlag in Relation zur Menschheitsgeschichte. Der Tod zeigt uns die Nichtigkeit und Flüchtigkeit der eigenen Existenz. DIE WELT DREHT SICH AUCH OHNE MICH WEITER. Es geht weiter, es kommt auf mich nicht so sehr an. Das empfinde ich irgendwie befreiend. Das weiß jeder, der wegen bestimmter Umstände eine Zeitlang im Outside war, der wie ich beispielsweise schwer krank oder in der Hölle war. Krankheit oder Tod relativieren das eigene Leben: sie zeigen, wie sinnlos alle Selbstoptimierung, Selbstdarstellung, Rollenerwartungen sein können. Und dennoch ist es wichtig und richtig, dass wir einen Sinn im Leben erkennen, eine (Lebens-)Aufgabe haben und das bestmögliche Leben zu leben. Es ist auch absolut berechtigt, dass wir ein gelungenes Dasein anstreben, ein lebenswertes Leben, ein zufriedenes, gesundes Leben, ein Leben mit zumindest 3 L’s : LEBENDIG, LIEBEND, LACHEND (Slogan unserer Plattform Prävention von Burnout, Depression und Sucht).

JEDER TAG IST EIN GEBURTSTAG!

In diesem Blogbeitrag ging es im wahrsten Sinne des Wortes um LEBEN und TOD. Der frühe Tod meiner Liebsten hat etwas Mahnendes für mein Leben. Es kann jeden Augenblick vorbei sein. Vor diesem Hintergrund hat die ebenfalls so oft zitierte Aussage große Bedeutung: JEDER AUGENBLICK ZÄHLT. FANG JETZT AN ZU LEBEN UND ZÄHLE JEDEN TAG ALS EIN LEBEN FÜR SICH. JEDER TAG IST EIN GEBURTSTAG. JEDER TAG IST EIN ANFANG (aus: 365 Glücksgedanken, 30. Januar, siehe Fotogalerie).

Ein Prosit auf die Verstorbenen, auf die Gesundheit, die Liebe und das Leben!

Hasta la vista baby (sagte mein Schwesterherz kurz vor ihrem Ableben). Auf Wiedersehen sage ich jetzt (hoffentlich noch in dieser Welt). Ciao amici. Ci vediamo. 
CCC-CHARLY, Carletto, Carl Way of Carl 
Karl Nessmann

Wien-Klagenfurt-Arnoldstein, 30.1.2019

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